My first and only child turns 5 this weekend. I’m totally one of those moms “I can’t believe she’s going to be 5!” or “where has the time gone!” The truth is, I never really felt like time went all that fast before she was around. In fact, much of my time was spent staying in bed until 2 pm on Saturday binge watching Law and Order. The only real concern I had was having money to pay my bills and making sure I had clean underwear. The rest of the stuff just happened. If I felt like working out, I did that. If I felt like spending the afternoon crafting, I did it. Chinese food? Sure. I didn’t have to worry about much outside of what I wanted to do at any given time.
Fast forward five years. Where every moment of those five years was captured by child milestones. Time all the sudden seemed to move so quickly when I started watching this small human morph right before my eyes. Wondering how to make her eat more than cheerios, keeping her from running in the road, constantly buying socks because where do they go? I found myself in a constant state of planning for and worrying about my daughter. I fell into defining myself by motherhood. I was a mom and I would do anything for my daughter. End of story.
Uh yeah, no, it’s not though. I’m always going to have an invisible string connecting me to a sassy little girl. But I’m also a product manager, I love my job, I’m knowledgeable, valuable. I’m a big sister, I give advice. I’m a crafty person, usually getting glue on the furniture. I’m a friend, a kickboxer, a kitchen dance party haver. I’m obsessed with tennis shoes, I love a good garage sale, I’m lazy with my laundry. I’d rather spend time in the moment with people I care about than making sure my house is spotless.
So what? The point, that’s what. Who are you?
Who are you?
Who are you?
Being a mother is something you do, it’s not who you are. We already talked about how precious time is, especially when we are mothering our children. So much of our time is dedicated to our kids, it’s no wonder many of us identify ourselves solely as mothers. This is a MSA – Mother Service Announcement – go find yourself. Dedicate time to you. Even if one hour a week, make.it.happen. Try something new, go somewhere uncomfortable, talk to a stranger – learn who you are. And don’t do it for anyone else but yourself. Know yourself, love yourself, challenge yourself, admire yourself – just as you would for your own child. Fight. Fight for that person, she’s in there and she’s well worth the effort.